I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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