At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize