I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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