And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
