My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
