i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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