the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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