you would pick up someone in the library
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
