he shaved USA in his pubs
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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