the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
