Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
And my parents said I crawled through the house
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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