I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
