I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
