Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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