is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize