Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
