I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
