Kareoke will never be a sober sport
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
