Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
