how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
