in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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