so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize