so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
