ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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