Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize