they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
