My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize