He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
