It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
This is my gift to your gina
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
