I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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