I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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