You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
