Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
