I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
