He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
