It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I just gargled with NyQuil
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
