I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
