I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
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