Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I could make wine with my vomit
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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