Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
