I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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