Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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