I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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