So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Randomize
