Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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