why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Can I color on your dick again?
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
