i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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