All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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