we're blogging at a bar
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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