oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
