but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
