Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
This baby is an asshole
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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